I may only be a few months old but I’m so thankful you’re my daddy. From the moment I came into world you were there helping mummy be strong and showed her love like never before. You were there when I was brought into this world, carried to the table, watched me as I was weighed, wrapped up in my first bit of clothes in this world; a white towel. Whilst mummy was being looked after, you were handed me, entrusted to look after us as your new little family. With Nanna you watched as mummy was checked over, given the all clear, wiped away her tears, kissed her and happiness filled you both.
We’ve managed 8 weeks so far, can you believe it I’m already 2 months old?! You’ve seen the first 8 weeks were tough, that you shouldn’t have expected too much from me. It takes a while for me to go from tiny, pooping, crying-all-hours-of-the-night baby to offering you a little more of a normal-ish routine that you’re used to, except with a baby. The first 6 weeks of my presence on earth you’ve seen me grow, develop, mature, see me show a little personality, a face like yours, a frown like mummy, a smile when you tickle my chin, a fart or two when fed my bottle. I’ve become a little predictable with fake tears and when I want cuddles but I wouldn’t want them with anyone else apart from you and mummy.
- Please know that when you feed me, it’s a special bond between us. Our alone time. In mummy’s tummy, I was fed on demand, in this warm protective cave and now I can’t speak for myself except offer cries and sticking my tongue out until that big bottle of milk is given. You need to feed me on demand so that I can grow big and strong. Be thankful that although mummy can’t breastfeed it gives us the opportunity to communicate, to bond, to be with each other.
- Please hold, cuddle, cradle, rock, bounce and soothe me when I’m upset and need my daddy. Need reassurance. In this world you are my protector, in the womb I was always protected. I am safer in your arms.
- Sing to me, read to me, help me understand the world I’m part of.
- I may cry a lot, for reasons sometimes unknown. But my cry is my tongue, communicating with you to let you know I’m hungry, if I’m tired or need that nappy changing that you hate doing. But be happy in knowing soon I’ll be able to talk to you, offering little words here and there before, one day you’ll laugh and try and remember what a moment of peace was like!
- I may have your eyes and mummy’s dark hair, but you’ll now notice how much I’m alike or different to you, how my personality will start to take form as I mature in this world.
- Watch me as I smile, learn to copy your every movement that I’ll one day make my own, laugh at your silly faces, make my own stamp on this big wide world.
- Please play with me so that I’ll learn. That I can laugh and share my enjoyment, excitement and happiness with you. You will teach me about football, the offside rule (that mummy still has no clue about), that Pulp are indeed a great band, that Drew Pritchard on Salvage Hunters should be considered a TV legend even though mummy thinks you’re weird and slightly obsessed. That it’s fine to be addicted to eBay (although you may change your mind about that when I’m old enough!), that you are a great sous chef even though really mummy is the best cook in the world and you only ever just stir things a little and love eating it, that you snores are my comfort when I’m asleep so that I know you’re there. That all of this is why I love you.
- I know it may seem that mummy is having all the fun at the moment but you’re my daddy and our moments together when you get in from work, at bath time, cuddles before bed, in the middle of the night or early morning, when you sing to me and I stare at you with bewilderment, when you try to blow raspberries on my tummy and I don’t show signs I enjoy it, they are special to me and we’ll always be our thing.
There will be days daddy when it’s really hard, when I’m crying and even I don’t know what’s wrong. The world I’m used to was my home for 9 months and this world seems so foreign to me. I have been here all of 56 days and sometimes I’m scared, I have a feeling of worry, being alone and my cries may be frustrating, worrying, repetitive and concerning, but I look to you and mummy as parents, my guardians of this world, who’ll offer me comfort and knowledge that I’m always safe and protected, that I am your baby and always will be at 2 months, 16 years or 32 years old.
It will get better, I promise. Time will fly. Moments will change. I’ll cry less and start to talk more. I’ll begin to crawl, look to find ways to support myself, try and walk, start to say words like da-da and watch as mummy gets a little frustrated that your name was said first before hers. There is a whole world to explore with you daddy and I may not give you the answers right now but this is only a small part of the world that I know, bear with me, we have so many adventures to come.
Please keep this letter safe and always close to your heart. I am and forever will be yours, it’s us against the world daddy and I’ll forever be your little girl.
I love you,